Sunday, June 13, 2010

Low Self-Esteem Can Destroy a Relationship

Back in the early 1980s, I was in charge of personnel management at the Armed Forces Staff College in Norfolk, Virginia. I had a one-hour commute to work from my home in Seaford, and I often listened to talk radio to pass the time. My favorite host was a psychologist named Dr. David Viscott. 

This video clip of Dr. Viscott from YouTube is a fascinating look at how a skilled counselor talks with a troubled listener. Watch him as he coaches "Brad," who explains why he behaves in a controlling way in his relationship with a talented woman. 

Brad's situation illustrates how low self-esteem can damage a relationship. Dr. Viscott's advice is on target, and to Brad's credit, he seems to muster the grit to give it a try.

Post by Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D., Copyright 2010. Building Personal Strength .

1 comment:

Robin Easton said...

Dear Denny,

This IS great!!
I thought of another point (from a woman's perspective) that he missed... (

Women LOVE a man who is willing to be vulnerable about his own feelings. And the moment he is willing to be vulnerable, she will be right there for him. She will ADORE him, love him so much because there is now intimacy, connection, feelings, etc, all things most healthy women thrive on. LOL! :)

Healthy women, LOVE a man who can express his deepest heart feelings. Although she may say, "Yes, you have been a jerk." BUT 9 times out of 10, she will then want to love him, nurture him, connect in a deep way with him, etc. And if she DOESN'T want this, then the guy is better off without her. He must continue to bare his soul and his feelings regardless of how ANY woman responds. Men are beautiful beings filled with wonderful emotions, tears, laughter, VULNERABILITIES, practical advice, and love. And I think now, maybe more than ever, they are to be encourage and applauded for expressing their feelings and vulnerabilities.

Excellent post!! Insightful, warmly comical, and wise. Thank you, Denny.

Robin Easton