A cynical person might say, "So what? Self-esteem is over-rated."
But a low opinion of yourself can set you up for failure, because it can cause you to:
- Feel ashamed and unsure of yourself because of past misdeeds, shortcomings, issues, and failures
- Compare yourself to others who have more character strength and success, which making you feel inadequate
- Feel anger towards stronger, more gifted or accomplished people
- Interpret advice, suggestions and input as criticisms and put-downs
- Don’t appreciate your good qualities or give yourself credit for your accomplishments
- Habitually criticize yourself and put yourself down
- Feel unattractive, unlikable, unlovable and undesirable
- Feel unworthy of relationships with people who have high self-esteem
- Tend to repel strong, capable people, who are put off by manifestations of low self-esteem
- Be more comfortable associating with other people with low self-esteem, who are more likely to contribute to your failure than to your success
- Be vulnerable to peer pressure, because being excluded is painful
- Exaggerate or lie about accomplishments to compensate for inadequacies, shortcomings, issues, mistakes, and failures
- Have a pattern of self-deception and self-loathing
- Feel unworthy of success, and so you don’t seek or welcome new challenges and opportunities
- Are likely to abuse alcohol or drugs to medicate the pain of failure, self-loathing and exclusion
You can see how insidious low self-esteem can be. No, strong, healthy self-esteem is not over-rated.
Post by Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D., Copyright 2013. Building Personal Strength .